We all have our own needs in a relationship. And these needs are not all the same for every individual. Even the way we express and feel love are not the same. Knowing your and your partner's love languages can help you understand your partner more, what his/her needs are, his/her reactions to situations, etc. You will also gain a better understanding of your own needs and expressions of love. Hopefully, this understanding of the love languages will help couples form a more satisfying relationship.
Here are the descriptions of the five love languages according to the site :
Words of Affirmation
Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.
Quality Time
In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.
Receiving Gifts
Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures.
Acts of Service
Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.
Physical Touch
This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.
To know your love language, take the test and get a better understanding of the Love Languages and be on your way to an improved relationship and understanding of your self.
Recently, I took the test again after about more than 4 years since I took the test the first time. And surprisingly, the results came out differently. Whereas before, they kind of remained constant or close. (I took the test about 3 times within the span of 2 years.) What I realize is, my needs have changed and so has my view of what love is and how I feel loved. Whereas before, my primary love language was time, now it's acts of service. I think this has to do with the fact that I now view a person's actions as a valuable proof of love.
Recently, I took the test again after about more than 4 years since I took the test the first time. And surprisingly, the results came out differently. Whereas before, they kind of remained constant or close. (I took the test about 3 times within the span of 2 years.) What I realize is, my needs have changed and so has my view of what love is and how I feel loved. Whereas before, my primary love language was time, now it's acts of service. I think this has to do with the fact that I now view a person's actions as a valuable proof of love.
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